Script

SIDE 1

ALEX

Surprise!


MARTY

Aaaagh! Alex, don’t interrupt me when I’m daydreaming. When the zebra’s in the zone, leave ’em alone.

ALEX

C’mon, Marty! Can’t a guy drop by to see his best friend? His best buddy? Say hi? Maybe even say, oh I don’t know...

(GLORIA, MELMAN, the LIONESSES and MASON the Chimpanzee enter with a cake.)

GLORIA, MELMAN, LIONESSES, MASON

Happy birthday!!!

MARTY

Aw, you guys...

(The group recites their clearly planned birthday greeting.)

GLORIA

Happy birthday Marty! We made you something sweet.

ALEX

It’s covered in frosting and it’s so good to eat.

MELMAN

Ooh, it’s your tenth birthday, this party is for you.

GLORIA, MELMAN, LIONESSES

Because you act like a monkey and you smell like one too!

MASON

Smell like a monkey?! I say! Stop perpetuating that loathsome stereotype! Uncivilized barbarians!

SIDE 2

SKIPPER

Visuals! Report!


KOWALSKI

We’re in a crate on a ship in the ocean, Skipper.

SKIPPER

Interesting.

(to MASON)

You! Higher mammal. Can you read?

MASON

(reading the shipping label on their crate)

Your crate says ‘SHIP TO KENYA WILDLIFE PRESERVE, AFRICA.’ Congratulations.

SKIPPER

Africa? That ain’t gonna fly! Rico! Break that lock.

RICO

Hie-ya!

(RICO karate-chops the lock, which falls off. The PENGUINS open the front of the crate and jump out onto the deck of the ship.)

PENGUINS

Hye! Hye! Hye! Hye!

SKIPPER

We’re taking control of this rust bucket. Let’s move to the bridge.

(The PENGUINS waddle over towards the SHIP’S CAPTAIN.)

MASON

Bon voyage, you formal-wearing fowl! Enjoy your little mutiny!

(The PENGUINS sneak up on the SHIP’S CAPTAIN.)

MELMAN

Uhhhh, these waves are making me nauseous... I’m allergic to seasick pills. Oh, brother. There’s nothing worse than traveling in a crate. Ow! Splinter!

SHIP’S CAPTAIN

Oh, boy, I love the ocean... I really love my boat...

(The PENGUINS form a small pyramid behind the SHIP’S CAPTAIN with RICO on the top. RICO karate-chops the SHIP’S CAPTAIN on the neck.)

RICO

Hie-ya!

SHIP’S CAPTAIN

Ooff!